I'm losing track...is it World War III or IV?

Sometimes, when sequels begin to grow that large, they just change the name. Ergo, Superman Returns instead of Superman V. Then again the James Bond movies tossed out the whole numbering sequels thing entirely, which is good considering that they're up to twenty-something movies, and six Bonds. The original cast of Star Trek did number their movies, but every one really remembers them by their sub-titles. That is except for Star Trek V, which no one remembers.

Why do I bring this up? Well, beyond the fact that I like to hear myself talk I was wondering about this whole issue of calling the Israel/ Hamas/ Hezbollah thing World War III. Bill Berkowitz has a great review of the World War III label here, from Newt Gingrich on Meet the Press last week, to how the Project for the New American Century (or as I like to say, Nazis) used the term to rile up support for their Iraq war dream that became our nightmare. Personally, I'm sorta hyped for a World War III. One, it would simplify things tremendously. No longer would I have to say "the Israel/ Hamas/ Hezbollah thing," but I could just say World War III. Two, the little demonic neocon I have in my heart would like to have a World War just to feel like something great has happened in my generation. We lack goals. We shrug our shoulders when we hear about going to Mars, we sure as hell don't wanna end poverty, hunger, or AIDS, and our biggest challenge seems to be not keeping idiots in the White House. Truly this is a worthy goal...but it just doesn't have enough bombs and explosions and bullets to hold American interest which is roughly the span of a fruit fly. We want a Michael Bay extravaganza, not an Al Gore let's-all-recycle-and-save-the-planet hippyfest. Speaking of which, where the hell is he about what's going on? You know a lot of friggin pollution goes into the atmosphere when you're dropping twenty ton bombs on hospitals. What's the greenhouse gas emissions on that? Then again, at least the bodies of the children are bio-degradable.

What I find particularly funny about the neocon use of the the World War III label were that these are the same guys who tried to convince us that the Cold War was WW III. Course now they wanna roll that back because if they started calling it WW IV they'd have to explain to our poorly educated youth about the Cold War, and what that was ,and when it happened, and Lord knows you can't go educating people while you're trying to scare the holy ghost crap outta them.

Here's a rule of thumb to get you through the day: when ever you hear these guys trot out the terms "World War," or "War" in general, remember they are trying to get us involved. War to these folks doesn't mean death and bloodshed and suffering, but denotes opportunities for exploitation and corruption. That's why they're so goosed about World War III--but deny that Iraq is in the midst of a civil war. We've drained all we can outta there, and regardless of their tough talk about 'staying the course,' and 'cutting and running,' they would love to leave Iraq like a coyote ugly girl they picked up at a bar the previous night who's wearing their t-shirt, and cooking them breakfast the next morning.

Regardless folks, don't believe the hype. This isn't World War III; and, if you ask me, World War II should have been World War I. Their use of the WW label demeans and degrades what should be something of global importance. Hitler was the greatest challenge this planet ever faced and there is no doubt in my mind that should he have won every man, woman, and child on this planet would have been affected. No matter who wins in this minor scuffle in the Middle East our lives in America will not be directly changed. Just like the Iraq war has not profoundly changed the face of the US, nor the first Iraq war, or Granada, or Panama. Call it small thinking, call it tunnel vision, but this idea of Team America: World Police has worn out its welcome, and its time that we get back from fighting World Wars, and get back to improving our country that we have neglected for far too long.

Besides, we should really save that next World War tag from something real juicy; like in 2015 when we get invaded by aliens. TO SERVE MAN! IT'S A COOKBOOK!!!!!!!